Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
you would pick up someone in the library
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
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