We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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