I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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