check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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