White coat. Heels.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
