i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
