life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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