Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
