we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I want to have your abortion
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
