Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
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We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
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Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize