I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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