we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
No I am not eating basil off your cock
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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