im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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