he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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