Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
