So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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