yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
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And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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