is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
