We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?