Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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