uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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