the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
