How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
