it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
