I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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