grandma shit on top of the toilet
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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