whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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