I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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