well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Randomize
