You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
