we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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