a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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