I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
