saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize