"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
