I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
