porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Hippo gnu deer
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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