After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
