he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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