If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Actions speak louder than pants.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I'm just crazy horny about you
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
