Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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