I puked a lego.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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