why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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