I am spending my child support on dildos
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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