Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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