I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
