so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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