I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I have tasted many bathrooms
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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