At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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