go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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