I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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