But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I enjoy the company of your penis
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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